I would like to encourage anyone who is a member of a church to approach a visitor this Sunday and have a conversation. I would suggest scouting them out while you are sitting in church because us visitors like to leave quickly after the service is over. In fact, if you sit in the same location each week and know all the members around you then you need to change locations. I suggest sitting in the back.
I refer to my opinion sometimes as the "general population" and I will pass along questions that I think the general population would feel comfortable being asked (as a visitor in church).
Safe Questions:
1 - Hi my name is X. I don't believe that I have met you before. Are you visiting?
2 - How did you hear about X church?
*****This can lead into another light conversation.
If they say referral - talk about who and how they know each other.
If they say they live close talk about the area..ex: oh this is a nice area to live in. Do you to go x (park, mall, great restaurant) nearby.
If they say they looked it up online talk about how great the internet is and how online has saved you in the kitchen or how it has connected you with lost friends.
3 - Are you enjoying the summer? Have you spent much time outdoors?
4 - Well it was great meeting you. We have x class that meet x time and I would love to have you come and join us. Or we are having x event at church next x...you should come attend. I went to it last year and it was amazing. It may seem hard to believe but adult classes are not marketed well. Kid and teen classes are always in the program but not always adult classes. Share this information with a visitor. Otherwise, it may take them weeks of visiting to get the nerve to ask the visitor center about it. Sounds weird, but true...remember I am the general population.
Dead End Questions:
1 - Are you married? - If you don't see a spouse standing nearby, don't ask. A yes or no answer is awkward either way.
2 - Do you have kids? - Again, if they aren't hanging on my legs or bulging out of my tummy then don't ask.
3 - What do you do for work? - While this one is tempting...I suggest against it. It feels like you are sizing them up.
And as a visitor I will...
1 - Answer your open ended questions
2 - Try to not sit on the back row
3 - Walk slowly to give you time to stop me for a conversation
4 - Ask about adult classes at the visitor center at the second attendance
Let me know if you have any success this weekend!
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3 comments:
Jan - I love It!! As Jeff and I are going to a new church this weekend for the first time....I will keep everything in mind that you posted.
I also will have to give major props to a lady named Natalie at a church I had been visiting. I feel the need to share....We had been visiting Hibben UM and had been a couple times. One weekend Jeff was out of town and I was there by myself. Natalie and her husband were sitting next to me. At the end of the service, she first started the conversation, by saying how much she loved the dress I had on and where did I get it. Then she asked if I were new as she hadn't seen me before. I told her I was visiting and she immediately said that her and her husband did the same. She asked me what other churches I had visited as well, and she had great things to say about all the ones I mentioned. Even saying that her brother attended one of the other churches. She made me feel better by saying that it took them a while to find a church home also. She then ended the conversation as we were walking out by inviting me to a cookout that was going on in the church lawn that night, for a parade that was going to be going on down the street. As I thanked her for the invite and let her know we already had plans of dinner with friends; she kindly just said she hoped to see me again, and again complimented the dress. I left feeling good and with a smile on my face!! I will say that that church so far has been the closest to feeling like "home" - although we are really excited about the new one this weekend - so wish us luck!!
Thanks for sharing Jan - and thanks for letting me share back! xoxo
Jan,
Thank you for making us all more aware of this situation. It is just too easy to get "comfortable." From this lesson, I will try harder to step out and seek every opportunity to be what I have been called to be--a disciple of Christ. I will try not to limit my opportunities to the inside of the church building, but in all places at all times.
Trying to do better,
MOM
CHAD, BIRTHDAY BOY!!!
Happy, Happy Birthday to YOU!! I know that Jana is planning a big day for you both today-I'm writing on Saturday, the 9th. I love you for making Jana so happy. I hope your day and everyday that follows is full of dreams come true!
You are my VERY BEST SON-IN-LAW!!!
Love yall,
Trish
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