Honesty

I have always valued honesty and one of my character traits, like it or not, is blunt honesty (I sugar coat it on occasion) so I am sharing with you this post.
I have the Baby Blues.
There, I said it. I love Summer completely but my high expectations combined with the hormone imbalance of childbirth has put me in the "baby blues" category. I want to be real. I want to be that person who told you the truth so that even though you may not experience it yourself, you will at least know it can happen to someone you know.
I think my expectations of mother and baby were so high because I never had a reason to lower them. I had only heard of friends and family having babies...the baby is adorable and then the family is complete...the end. I spent the past 9 months drooling over how cute her nursery was and how I was going to play dress up with her that I was surprised/blindsighted by how much work is involved in being a mother...how much sacrifice of your time and your own physical needs and therefore not meeting up to the expectations I had set for myself. I felt/feel guilty that I am not perkier, more social and generally happier. After all, I just had that greatest blessing given to me. And I do feel grateful and blessed but also anxious.
I have a fussy baby. I understand that this is a phase and she will grow out of it at some point but it was a disappointment (it took guts to right that word) when she went from our Angel baby the first 2 weeks who did nothing but sleep, eat and look adorable to a baby that slept less and cried during her awake hours. When she is asleep I feel relief that the crying has stopped. When we are in public I keep her sun shade closed to keep her asleep for fear of her having a meltdown. In my mind these are bad feelings.
I asked my doctor today for some medication to help me get through this. Chalk me up as a statistic of our generation...I have asked for a happy pill. Yes, I could probably talk this through with someone but I don't have the time or energy to talk these days. I need something to get me back to normal...medication to balance my out-of-wak hormones.
This is what is happening with me. It may not happen to you but if it does you can be relieved that you are not the only one.
I am not a pity case. I am not sitting in a room crying all day (that's Summer, just kidding) so please don't think that. I am simply a new mom trying to figure it out and thought that someone might benefit from knowing the real story behind this blogger.

Motherhood

Oh how Motherhood can change a girl!

Today I found myself walking around the neighborhood wearing a cotton maternity sundress, tennis shoes and a ponytail cocked sideways from sleeping! Worst part...it didn't bother me!

• Will there be a day when I care about my looks again?
• Will I get to shower on a regular basis?
• Will I ever choose to tan in the sun over taking a nap?

Until that day comes I will be happy that...

• I have curly hair and it is pretty forgiving when it comes to style...I've probably snuck a dirty hair day by you once or twice without you noticing.
• I don't know anyone in our neighborhood.
• Oh yes...and I have a BEAUTIFUL daughter who will one day soon smile at me and make it all worthwhile! I say that only because we have been battling tears in our waking hours. It seems that when she is awake she is on the verge of crying. I don't think it is colic as she IS consolable. I think she is just so SMART that she gets board easily and therefore is constantly telling us we need to challenge her more:)

Tell me your stories...was there a moment when you realized your priorities had changed? Let's laugh together!

By the way, sleeping is improving. She has been sleeping in 4 hour stretches this week and she easily goes down after her 10pm and 2am feedings! Actually last night she slept for a 5 hour stretch and a 4 hour stretch. That is awesome and I am thrilled with her progress.

I took a video of Summer waking up from her nap yesterday and she was so happy BUT of course something happened with my video upload and I can't share it. However, I was able to take a snapshop from the video (a new tool I am starting to use) of a SMILE.

FYI - I figured out the formating of the picture uploads. When I browse to upload the photos there is an option on the pop up window for indent and the size of the picture. That was just a natural step that I wasn't even looking at the settings.

Weigh In

Yesterday Summer and I went to our new Mom's support group class and I was able to weigh her and she tipped the scales at a whopping 8 lb 3 oz!!! Last week I said she weighed 7 lb 2 oz BUT I was wrong...it was 7 lb 15 oz. The nurse said she should be gaining 4-8 oz per week so she is on the bottom end of the chart which makes sense as she was small to begin with.

I asked the moms and nurses about holding her too much and creating a baby that must be held to be content and I got a mixed response. I think the result that we are going to go with, at the moment, is to meet her need but not exceed it. If she cries in her crib we will go check on her; talk and touch her and if necessary pick her up but once she is content we will put her back down. I can just tell this is going to be pointless as just when we think we have it down she will be over this phase...she is two steps ahead of us.

If Summer had it her way she would be held like this ALL the time.












This is what Summer looks like at 8 lb 3 oz. Today she made great progress. Summer was content looking around in her bounce seat for 25 minutes, wahoo!












I want to announce the newest member to the Savage family...Sadie (middle name tbd) Savage!
Jay and Jen got Sadie on Memorial Day and she has had an adventurous life so far. She has swam for the first time in the lake and she goes on boat rides...I am jealous. The funniest thing is that in the first few weeks of her life she slept in a casserole dish as it was secure and cool but as you can see she is quickly outgrowing her casserole dish. Too funny!












I also want to congratulate my sweet cousin Tiffany on the news that Baby Reece Dubose is a BOY! He will have the best two big sisters, Ella Katherine and Emma, who will be able to help take care of him. We are very excited for you and can't wait to meet the newest Bama fan!

Summer - 5 weeks

Summer is 5 weeks old today!

I was taking her 1 month old picture and tried to get her positioned on her own BUT...she needs my assistance to sit up straight!

She slept in the Miracle Blanket last night for the first time and it was a MIRACLE! She slept for 4 hour stretches and I was thrilled with that. I can only imagine that with a bit of time she will extend to 6+ hours like the website states. The blanket didn't move at all in the night which is good as her regular blankets sometimes are all over the place by the time she wakes up.

I would show a picture however there isn't a chance that I am going to wake her with the flash once she is wrapped and ready for bed.

At 5 weeks old, Summer loves for her Mommy and Daddy to hold her. She would prefer that we do this 24/7 however we are trying to set her down at times. It is a debated question whether you can hold too much or not at this age. At this time, I am going to hold her for a few minutes then put her down...meeting her need but trying not to exceed it. I will ask the other moms in my Thursday class how they handle this.

We are still waiting for her to smile at us intentionally. There may have been a smirk here and there but not a full blown I love you smile. Weeks 3 & 4 were especially hard for us as she began to communicate (cry) with us. We are seeing some improvement and hope that our second month of life gets sweeter.

She is growing everyday. This week Chad and I noticed that her baby hairs around her forehead have disappeared within a 24 hour timeframe. Seeing that kind of change is truly amazing! Her sweet hands and feet are gigantic (as you can see in the car seat picture below). Her fingers are long and stretch apart like mine do.

Here is a comparison of Summer in her car seat; week 1 vs. week 5.

Oh and this is a cute car seat picture from our Mommy class last Thursday.

Happy Father's Day

This Father's Day is extra special this year as we are celebrating Chad as a NEW dad! Summer is in love with her Daddy as you can see in the picture below. She looks at him with adoring eyes and feels secure when he holds her, feeds her and especially when he changes her diaper! At one month old, she loves to rest on his broad shoulder and stay as long as possible.

In addition to being a great Daddy, Chad is also a supportive husband. He is sensitive to my changing hormones (understatement) and willing to take the load off me when I have that look on my face. Plus he can do 40 push ups in a row without stopping to rest, impressive right!

We are thrilled to have Chad's dad, Grandad, spending the weekend with us. It is great for Chad to spend his first Father's Day with his new daughter and dad. It is obvious where Chad gets his Baby Whisperer skills...Doug can soothe Miss Summer right to sleep.











Here is a great video of Doug telling us how he does it.

Best of Intentions...Dad, Larry and all you graduates, I have been intending to mail these gifts to you all week. As you can see they are still on my kitchen counter. This in no way is a reflection of how much I care for you or how important you are in our lives. Actually, it has taken me 3 outings to get to this point. Hopefully it will be worth the wait. You should receive your package sometime later this week. Thanks for loving me enough to understand:)

Summer - 4 weeks

Summer is now 4 weeks (2 days late) old. She and I went to the New Mommy Support Group at the Hospital today and she weighed in at 7 lb 15 oz. She has gained about 1 pound per week since her 2 week appointment. I learned that she should be eating her weight times 2.5 or 2.7 if she is under weight, which she is. So we are about on track with our feedings. She is eating a little less than 4 oz per bottle. I also learned that the times when we fed her 4 oz then she acted hungry again and we fed her ANOTHER 4 oz that we were misinterpreting her needs. The nurse said she does not need to eat 8 oz at one time that it will stretch her tummy out, rather she needs to suck on a pacifier. So we will try that next time.
Speaking of sucking here is a video of Summer chillin' and trying to find her thumb.

Summer was good during the class. She slept in my arms. There were about 20 moms with babies there and it was neat to see and hear their different concerns and perspectives. I realized that my feelings and concerns are normal. Overall it was good and I will try to go every week. Surprisingly getting to the hospital by 10am was harder than I thought...and I didn't even shower! It is almost a guarantee that I will be a little late just about everywhere I go these days. I mean, I have always struggled with being on time so adding a "good reason" to the mix only makes it more likely for me to be late...fyi.

We took this video yesterday. Hopefully our weather is improving for Father's Day weekend as it has rained just about everyday for the past 3 weeks. I didn't realize how windy it was until after I watched the clip. Sorry Summer if you felt blasted.

Back to Jana

Life with a newborn will surely stop you in your tracks.
I am S-L-O-W-L-Y regaining some of what my life was like before Summer arrived.
Today I was able to get outside and pull some weeds and cut a fresh, beautiful rose from our front yard.








In addition, I was able to get crafty today! I wrapped Chad's FIRST FATHER'S DAY gift using a cut up brown paper bag and some recycled ribbon (from Melissa's bday gift to me). I think it turned out so "boutique!"
P.S. - I risked waking sweet Summer during her nap so that I could take this photo with her green gingham sheets as the background...what is wrong with me???








This is all due to the fact that I have been taking a nap everyday and getting some energy. Yesterday Summer and I napped together, so sweet.








This picture is for Nicole. She was asking about our swaddling technique and wondered how tight we had Summer wrapped up as an earlier picture looked loose. Here you go.
P.S. - I risked waking sweet Summer with the flash so that I could prove to Nicole I swaddle her right. Good thing she is turning out to be a sound sleeper!












We are back on the EASY program from the Baby Whisperer. Last night, Summer slept 4.5 hours straight. Praise God! We said a prayer for some good rest before bedtime and the big guy was listening. In the daytime I am waking her every 3 hours to feed and I can see some improvement.
Video of me waking her up yesterday.